The most normalised toxic behaviours are the ones we no longer notice: constant drinking, overwork, nonstop screens and the expectation of instant replies. Some are slowly being challenged. Australia banned social media accounts for under-16s from December 10, 2025, and laws such as France’s right to disconnect aim to protect off-hours. Here are 15 behaviours society has made normal, and what to do about each.
Welcome to Alux.com, the place where future billionaires come to get inspired. If you are not subscribed yet, you are missing out. Ditching the video version of this long article and continuing to read it is a toxic behaviour in itself, so here it is:
The 15 behaviours at a glance
| # | Behaviour | What to do instead |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Drinking as the default | Make alcohol optional |
| 2 | Blaming your parents for everything | Own your next step |
| 3 | Dressing kids as little adults | Let children be children |
| 4 | Overtime as proof of commitment | Measure results |
| 5 | Fear of getting fat | Teach health, not shame |
| 6 | Gender stereotypes | Allow range |
| 7 | Toxic masculinity | Normalise feelings |
| 8 | Applauding effort over results | Honest feedback |
| 9 | Hollow role models | Pick people who built something |
| 10 | Sugar in everything | Read the label |
| 11 | Doomscrolling the news | Set limits |
| 12 | Constant screens | Choose screen-free spaces |
| 13 | Monetising kids online | Protect their privacy |
| 14 | Expecting instant replies | Reply on your time |
| 15 | Wastefulness | Repair and reuse |
1. Drinking as the default
Drinking is about as normal as not smiling on public transport. It is assumed that most adults end the day with a drink or two, or the week with a drink or five. Just because something is legal and accepted does not make it healthy. The US Surgeon General has ranked alcohol third among preventable causes of cancer, after tobacco and obesity.
Try bringing a non-alcoholic drink to a party and see what a scene it creates. It should be unremarkable. Make alcohol optional, not assumed.
2. Blaming your parents for everything about you
Your parents messed up a bit. No one comes out of childhood unscathed, and we do not all start adult life at the same point. You can remain a child to your parents and blame them for everything, or you can start from exactly where you find yourself and improve every day. Understanding your past is healthy. Living in it is not.
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3. Dressing kids as little adults
It is still treated as normal in advertising, fashion and marketing to frame small children with adult styling. High heels for a three-year-old, or Valentine’s Day ads that cast two small children as a couple, are worth a second look. We say “aww” instead of asking who the styling is for. Children do not need adult roles. Let them be children.
4. Overtime as proof of commitment
In many cities, if you are not doing overtime, you are working under time. Staying late has become the price of recognition and promotion. Anyone who leaves when their work is done is judged less committed than someone who waits for the boss to go first.
Some countries are pushing back. France added the right to disconnect to its Labour Code, passed in the El Khomri law of 2016, to protect time off from work messages. Long hours reward seat-warming over performance. Judge people by results.
5. Fear of getting fat
Diet culture reaches children early. Many young girls say they worry about their weight, and the message that fat is a fate worse than death filters down from adults. These fears can last a lifetime. Teach children about food, movement and strength, not shame about their bodies.
6. Gender stereotypes
An outdated list of masculine and feminine traits is anti-progress, and some of our most toxic behaviours come from trying to fit it. Men feel they should be uncommunicative or “tough” when something affects them. Women feel pressure to act indecisive or submissive when they would prefer to take control. Even colours are still assigned: pink for girls, blue for boys. These stereotypes lead to our next point. Our video on manly stereotypes digs in:
7. Toxic masculinity
Toxic masculinity is the social pressure placed on men to be violent, competitive, independent and unfeeling. Men are taught to replace feelings with catchphrases, or with aggression the moment conflict arises. “Boys will be boys” explains nothing. The fix is simple to say and hard to do: make talking about feelings normal.
Aluxers, we recommend Toxic Relationships by Hope Utaram on Audible, where she explores all types of toxic relationships. We have a free download for you at alux.com/freebook.
8. Applauding effort over results
“Try your best” is about the worst advice for a child with big dreams. It sets them up for disappointment, and it is also what we tell ourselves when we attempt something significant. “Your best” is vague, and “trying” gets us nowhere on its own. In real life there are no prizes for trying and no midway medals. Praise effort that is aimed at a result, and be honest when the result is missing.
9. Hollow role models
Who a society celebrates tells you what it values. If the loudest role models are famous for being famous, we limit ourselves, and we end up feeling not hot or rich enough. There are countless better examples: scientists, builders, teachers, founders who created something. Choose role models who made something that helps others, and show your children the same.
10. Sugar in everything
Added sugar is so well hidden that we do not realise how much we eat. The American Heart Association recommends no more than 9 teaspoons (36 grams) a day for men and 6 teaspoons (25 grams) for women. There are more than 60 names for added sugar. Look for the word syrup, words ending in “-ose” such as dextrose, fructose and maltose, and also fruit nectars, juice concentrates, honey, agave and molasses.
If you want to make better health choices, check out 15 Health Mistakes You Don’t Know You’re Making.
11. Doomscrolling the news
Checking headlines first thing in the morning and last thing at night has become routine. A steady stream of bad news does not make you more informed, only more anxious. Pick a time to catch up, then put the phone down.
12. Constant screens
From waking up to going to bed, we are captive to screens, and not only our own. They pop up on the train, in taxis, in elevators, in the foyer of a school. We accept screens everywhere without ever consenting to them. Governments are starting to act: Australia’s ban on social media for under-16s took effect on December 10, 2025, covering platforms such as Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat and YouTube.
Aluxers, we released a video to help you get rid of your own toxic thoughts. Be sure to watch:
13. Using your kids to make money on social media
Posting your children’s lives online, for status or for income from unboxing videos and family vlogs, puts their privacy at stake before they can ask for it. Child entertainers have long had legal protections, and in recent years lawmakers have begun to extend child-labor rules to children who work as social media performers. The law in many places remains thin. Children do not get a say in how their lives are published, and they will have to live with it as adults.
14. Expecting immediate answers
“Two-tick fever” is real: when someone sees that you have read their message and have not replied, they act as if you have broken a rule. It forces us to respond to everyone all the time, regardless of what we are doing. The result is constant anxiety, dependence on our phones and drama that did not need to exist. Agree on your own reply windows, and respect other people’s.
15. Wastefulness
Chronic consumerism is one of the defining habits of our time: replace rather than repair, throw away a picnic blanket because it is heavy to carry, bin a broken hairdryer. The tide is turning slowly. The EU has pushed for common charging ports and right-to-repair rules, and in 2024 the US Federal Trade Commission sent warning letters to eight companies over warranty practices that discourage repairs. Look after the things you own, and there is always enough to go around.
Keep reading
- 15 ways social media is harming you: the screen-time problem in detail.
- 7 expensive habits people call normal: another list of things we stopped questioning.
FAQ
What are toxic behaviours that society has normalised?
Common ones include drinking as the default, overtime culture, constant screen time, expecting instant replies, wastefulness and gender stereotypes.
What is the right to disconnect?
A rule that protects employees from work messages outside work hours. France added it to its Labour Code through the El Khomri law of 2016.
Which countries restrict social media for children?
Australia banned accounts for under-16s on major platforms, in effect from December 10, 2025.
How much added sugar is too much?
The American Heart Association recommends no more than 36 grams (9 teaspoons) a day for men and 25 grams (6 teaspoons) for women.
What is toxic masculinity?
Social pressure on men to be violent, competitive, independent and unfeeling, which discourages them from talking about emotions.
How do I stop toxic habits?
Start by noticing them, then change one habit at a time: set reply windows, limit screens, and choose role models who built something worthwhile.
Last updated: October 2026.
